Per the MIL will the home is considered a "life estate" where the tenant can live there until death and the home belongs to the beneficiaries (aka children). In NY if you sell the home while the tenant is still alive, two things happen:It sounds like you two really have your plates full. Are you getting any help from the rest of her large family?My wife and I both come from large low income families.
We both take care of her mother’s home, finances and other personal needs.
Is there any reason why you are keeping her mother's home? It doesn't sound like there is any realistic chance of her returning to it. As it is you are incurring expense in time and money both for the nursing/memory care facility and the empty house. When my 94 year old mother went into assisted living memory care I cleared out as much hidden cash and valuable items from the mountains of clutter as I could and then used my POA to sell the house. The funds made a very useful addition to the investments paying for her care. I don't think she asked about her house once.
1. The tenant must receive 10% of the proceeds, which the memory care facility would immediately take.
2. The children would have to pay capital gains on the proceeds from the cost of the home in 1965 when purchased and the current market value.
It does not matter that the tenant actually resides in a memory care unit, our home or anywhere else.
We can't rent either as the rent would also go to the memory care facility.
Statistics: Posted by bhjjk19 — Sun Dec 21, 2025 6:00 am — Replies 53 — Views 7493